So far in Washington...

This post is mostly pictures and mostly boring. 

We are finally here and finally moved in and finally starting to settle down. Minus our rental truck being towed for a small fortune in Oregon, and a possible life-threatening, homeless-inducing mold situation in our new house, things went relatively well... Cross country moving is for the birds. As we were exhausted and tired and walking through Wal-Mart last night Josh told me he is prepared to die here.

I guess I'll kill him tomorrow and move back to Utah...

Also while wandering through Wal-Mart we heard some awesome lady tell her friend in the vitamin aisle that "You should just eat a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch every day. It has all the daily fiber you need!" Her friend then agreed and they left without any fiber pills. Win.

So here are a few pictures of our new corner of the globe so far...

Hoquiam city hall

City planner to the stars

These next few are of the waterfront in Hoquiam. I'm pretty much in love with tug boats.

I'm also in love with bridges.

More tugs!

A tsunami siren!

Some adorable church we found. 

This is the drive from Aberdeen to Olympia. It is literally the most beautiful hour I've ever spent. Just gorgeous. I drove the whole thing with my mouth wide open. Wow.

This isn't my photo but wow, Olympia is absolutely beautiful and I love it. I dare say it trumps Seattle and Tacoma in my book! So there! It's gorgeous.

That's all so far!

Eight Months

Now this is just not acceptable! How do you make someone stop growing up? A sorcerer's stone? I used to think that 8 months old was still a tiny baby but it is not! Cooper might as well be a toddler, he never wants to snuggle and he likes to throw toys across the room. As sad as it is, it's also so fun to watch him grow and learn new things. This month he has developed a lot!

This month:

For months we have been showing Cooper the sign for more. It involves putting your fingers together gently and nicely. I think I was under the impression Cooper would use these quiet sweet sign language moves to communicate with me and then he would go pick me some wild flowers and brush my hair as we listened to Enya. News flash you naive idiot. Cooper communicates wanting more (or just wanting anything) through an incredibly loud scream/grunt that turns his face purple. The other night at a restaurant he was doing this new trick while looking at my food and my mom was like, "I think you can forget about that sign language..." Now Cooper spends most of the day hollering for something, my food, my phone, wanting to bang on the computer keys... I think his little body hasn't caught up to the desire to get into stuff yet and it's making him frustrated.

This picture doesn't capture it too well but he stiffens his limbs, balls his fists, and holds his breath when he wants something.

Just as I thought he would never learn to crawl, all of the sudden in the same day he started scooting backwards and getting up on his knees and rocking back and forth. What a cutie. He scoots really far backwards and then gets kind of mad that he got so far away from his mommy and toys. It's so fun to watch him learn new things, it's almost as if he can't help it. Cooper just bings up onto his knees like a little whack a mole.

Cooper loves my cell phone and for a while he would scream his head off whenever I talked on the phone because he was jealous that he wasn't playing with it. Whenever I'd get done with the phone I'd hand it to him and let him play with it and then wonder if I'd ever be able to talk on the phone in quiet anymore. After a few times of handing him the phone when I was done, he learned that if he waited for me to be done talking he could play with it. Now when I'm on the phone he waits patiently for me to be done and then reaches his hand out for the phone as soon as I hang up. It's funny how quick they pick these things up.

A few months ago Cooper would grab my brother's dog like a rag doll and never let go. Now Cooper seems to grasp that a dog is different than one of his toys, he is really gentle and kind of timid around him now. He pets him gently and pulls his hand back quickly when he gets scared.

Cooper started doing something really sweet this week. When he's tired, he lays on the floor and drinks his bottle with one hand and then rubs his head with his other hand. How relaxing.

Cooper is quickly developing his motor skills! He has learned how to roll a ball back and forth.

After watching where I push on Elmo to make him talk, Cooper imitates me and pushes Elmo in the exact same spot.

And Cooper has learned how to pattycake by himself! When you start singing pattycake he will lightly pat his hands together! It is sooooooooo cute.

So those are all the new things my little sweetheart has done this month. I didn't realize until after I had taken these pictures and put them on the computer that Cooper is pretty much a filthy mess, his outfit is dirty, he has carrots caked all over his face, and drool streaming down his chin. But photo shoots are not Cooper's favorite pass time so oh well, these pictures will encapsulate how Cooper really looks most of the time. 

Love you big boy!

Please excuse our moving boxes.

I love this one because it looks like he's posing.

See? This kid is filthy. 

In the middle of shaking his head back and forth.

This is how the photo shoot ended, crawling over to chew on my feet.

Phone Conversations with Strangers

Yesterday I spent most of the day on the phone with various places in Aberdeen trying to find something to rent. For some reason no one has a website, or even a facebook page, or usually a phone number. On the rare occasion I do find a phone number, I have to call and try to pry some information out of these people. I had some completely ridiculous conversations with some people who I'm pretty sure should be unemployable. Enjoy.

Me: So I'm wondering if you still have this apartment for rent.
Lady: No. But we might have something else available.
Me: Ok
Lady: silence
Me: Well can you check?
Lady: Yes. More silence.
Me: Ok... Do you want to check now? Or should I give you my phone number to call me back after you've checked?
Lady: Sure. I'll check this afternoon (it's 9 a.m.) but if you don't hear from me, don't call me back. We get really busy here sometimes.
Ok lady... I won't call you back, I promise.

Me: Hi I'm wondering if you still have this apartment for rent.
Man: Nope it's been took.
That darn apartment-bandit. He's been tooking apartments all day.

Me: Hi I'm calling about your apartments, I'm relocating to the area from Utah and since you don't seem to have a website or any pictures online, I was wondering if maybe you could e-mail me some pictures of the rentals?
Lady: Um... Well... It's just kind of confusing for me because the phone keeps cutting out.
Me: Oh sorry.
Lady: It's probably because you're calling from so far away.
Yep, that must be the problem.

Me: Hi I'm wondering if you still have this apartment for rent.
Man: No we don't but we do have some other units.
Me: Ok, can you tell me about those?
Man: Well they're just like our apartments, the only thing is they're about half the size, they don't have a dishwasher, no washer/dryer and no fridge.
Me: Oh. Um what do people use for a fridge? (At this point out of sheer curiosity, not because I would ever live there.)
Man: Well most of your food comes in boxes or cans (that sounds like a balanced diet) and for your milk and eggs you can put them in the mini fridge in the office.
We have a winner!

Me: Hi, I'm wondering if you have any properties for rent that might be a good fit for my family, we'd need at least 2 bedrooms.
Lady: Oh we do have a house for rent that's 3 bedrooms in the area.
Me: Oh really? That sounds like it could be good, could you give me some more information about it?
Lady: Well the only thing is that the previous tenant was an ax-thrower (what? is that a thing?) and he used to practice indoors so there are a lot of wood chips everywhere.
How to choose between crazy ax-man's house and a place with no refrigerator.

So there it is folks. By the sound of it not only do we have some great housing options awaiting us, we have some even greater friends.

My mini meltdown

When I start to get stressed or worried about something Josh says I'm having a mini meltdown. Well that is what I'm having right now. Cures include writing, talking to Josh about my irrational fears late at night when all he wants to do is go to sleep, eating junk food, and watching trashy tv in bed.

Since Josh fell asleep early, I don't have any junk food, and I've already watched this week's Project Runway, writing will have to do. And speaking of trashy tv, every time I see a commercial for Dance Mom's I think why haven't I seen this show yet?!

So here comes my full meltdown...

Every time Josh and I have moved (without kids) everything has been easy. We've moved across the country twice with 2 weeks notice and it hasn't stressed me out much at all. However moving with kids is a horse of another color. We have about a million thing left to do and about one spare hour of nap time to do them in. It is really hard to get stuff done with Cooper. If we're on the computer looking for housing, Cooper is crying because we're not letting him bang on the keyboard. If we're packing in front of Cooper, Cooper is crying because he isn't touching everything and chewing on the boxes. If we're in the other room packing, Cooper is crying because we're not in the same room as he is. I didn't realize that our slow, post-baby pace would affect our move too.

Even if Cooper started magically playing happily by himself, we still have a million things to do! Most of which hinge on having an address which we do not have yet, despite Josh flying up there to check out a bunch of places. There is ominously nothing to rent in Aberdeen or surrounding areas. So far we have one apartment complex that we are still waiting to hear from because their hours are Monday-Thursday noon to four (another ominous sign) and a house that has a septic tank and is not hooked up to the city's water supply. Decisions decisions.

Also, I hate small towns. We both do. Harlingen had 75,000 people but to me it might as well have been one man and some cows. Aberdeen has like 4,000 people. I am going to die. When I googled shopping in Aberdeen this was all the came up. Please click on it and then feel sorry for me. Costco is 45 minutes away. And what if I might need something for Cooper one day, like a rain coat? I'd probably have to drive an hour and a half rountrip to Olympia to get it! We spent all day yesterday thinking yes we can live in Olympia. We can make the commute! Josh can drive 100 miles a day! And slowly but surely we realized we were doomed and that driving to Olympia would cost 8 dollars a day in gas. Yikes.

And what if no one wants to be my friend? And I sit alone inside all day with Cooper and Elmo? I was lucky enough to meet a lot of awesome people in Texas but what if everyone in Aberdeen just wants to shoot heroin behind dumpsters? Is that even what you do with heroin? See? I'm not going to fit in.

We called one of the branch presidents to see if he knew of anything for rent in the area, they were thrilled that we had a kid because right now they only have one kid in primary. One kid! So I guess I really hope Cooper and Billy get along really well.

And my biggest fear is what if Cooper hates it? What if we get there and he never laughs or smiles again? Here I know that he's happy. I know that he likes where we live and he likes the people he spends time with. What if some day he's sitting in a psychiatrist's office and telling all about how his parents moved him away from everything he knew when he was 7 months old and that's the reason he shoots heroin behind dumpsters?

What if I made the wrong life decisions? 
What if I had gone back to work full time after having Cooper instead of deciding to stay home?
What if we had chosen different career fields?
What if we had never moved?
What if somewhere I made a mistake or a bad choice and it ends up affecting Cooper's happiness?
I guess it all boils down to- am I doing the right thing for my son?

Sometimes I worry that I'm not and that I'm living such an inadequate life that isn't worthy of caring for such a precious person. I didn't go to Harvard law school, I didn't marry a Kennedy, I still don't have everything all figured out. What happens when Cooper finds out that I'm kind of a hot mess who lives in a dinky town in Washington and still has student loans? 

Saying good-bye to Cooper's first home

I wanted to take some pictures of our condo before we started packing and it turned into a huge mess. I didn't really want pictures of the actual condo, but pictures of everything that reminded me of Cooper. When we made our decision to move I started bawling about leaving the place that Cooper came home from the hopsital to, where he cried in the middle of the night, where he tried his first food, where he first learned to roll, where we heard his first laugh... We have truly had some wonderful memories here. I wish I could freeze time. I wish that I could keep Cooper my little tiny baby forever.

We don't co-sleep but Cooper has ended up here quite a few nights anyway. During one illness he would wake up every couple hours and just want his binkie and his head rubbed so Josh and I would let him sleep with us so we could reach him easier. Other nights when he was younger we would have taken an hour or more to try to get him down for the night, then we'd give up and let him sleep in our bed. After fighting sleep for hours he would snuggle up between us, turn his head to look at me, then look at Josh and go right to sleep. Even though I got terrible sleep those nights, I loved waking up with my little guy next to me, even if I woke up because he was kicking me in the back. :)

This is where we had so many meal times. Where Cooper tried his first baby puree and now where he munches on whatever is on mom and dad's plate because clearly that is the better food choice. I'm convinced Cooper would eat anything if he saw Josh and I eat it first. Cooper's had rice with soy sauce, rice with spicy cajun seasoning and tomato paste, noodles with pesto, tomatoes with balsamic dressing... Food is his favorite thing, no question about it.

This is Cooper's favorite thing about our home. He loves staring at this bookcase. His eyes light up when we walk through the door and he sees our bookcase. I've decided that Cooper hates change just as much as I do. He doesn't enjoy going out and seeing new things as much as he enjoys staying home and seeing familiar things.

Another one of Cooper's favorite things. He loves to stare at the microwave. It's where we heat up his food at mealtimes so maybe he associates it with food. But he loves to stare at it even when there's nothing in it either. When we go into the kitchen to make a bottle or to do something else he clenches his fists, trembles with excitement, and breaks into a pant when he sees the microwave.

Cooper's bathroom. He loves to look at these pictures of himself. I think Cooper is his own favorite person.

Cooper absolutely loves the thermostat. Loves it. Every day I hold him up to it and he swats his hand at it with glee. Maybe he loves it because he sees me touch it sometimes. Cooper definitely always wants to touch and play with whatever the adults are playing with.

The first couple months of Cooper's life he would only nap while being held and those were the times when he napped the most. I spent a lot of time on this couch holding my baby as he slept. I would have Josh bring me the remote and some snacks while I was holding the baby. Yes, it was a little ridiculous that Cooper wouldn't nap any other way, but looking back, it was so much more wonderful than it was inconvient. I would give anything for Cooper to let me snuggle him as he slept again! I know that was a beautiful, sweet time with my boy that I will never get back again and I loved every second of it.

This is where I would sit Cooper in his bumbo chair while I attempted to keep him happy long enough to make dinner. Sweet Cooper just loves to be held and oftentimes dinner had to wait until Josh got home and could play with him while I cooked. 

Cooper's toy shelf in his room. We walk past this every time we go to his changing table and he would get so excited to see his toys and especially the picture of himself. We would stop on the way to diaper change and just enjoy his toys for a while. He especially loves the kangaroo and for some reason the pony makes him cry. :)

Our carpet. So many memories here. This is where Cooper first rolled over and I cried like a baby. It was where Cooper took some of his naps when he was small, it is where he lays and drinks his bottle, it is where he plays with his toys and his mom and dad. 

It is where we got to know our boy. 

The Evergreen State

The Beach's are moving.
Again.
This will be the 4th state we've moved to now. One of these days we're going to settle down, I promise. Josh's job is very specific and sort of requires a lot of moving around until you have enough experience where you can have good location + good pay all at the same time. Until then it's really one or the other.

As someone who hates change and wants to live in the exact same place with the same stuff and the same people and eat the same food every day for the rest of my life, these last few years have been interesting for me. My mom even said that when I was little I'd get super upset when she would buy me new sheets because I just wanted everything to stay the same. And I pretty much still do.

But apparently we don't write down exactly what paths we want our lives to take and mail it into heaven. In fact in each of the places my life has taken me thus far, I can now look back and see where the Lord's hand has guided our family to where we needed to be. We can't see the reasons and the path ahead while we're in the moment for a specific purpose, so we can have the opportunity to practice and build our faith. So far the Lord's plan for my life has been far greater than my own so I put my trust in Him once more and hope there is a reason and a purpose for us to go to Aberdeen, Washington.

This was a TOUGH decision. Literally the toughest life decision I've made so far. For some reason now that I have Cooper, every decision whether it's where to live or what to cook for dinner seems a hundred times more important and terrifying to get wrong. I love Utah, I love living around my family, I love the mountains, I love Cafe Rio. We want to end up settling here when the time is right and we can make it work but unfortunately that time is not right now. And once again, I guess we can't fill out a request form and check off exactly how we want our lives to play out. Sometimes being an adult is pretty much the worst.

We took the weekend to make our decision and fortunately it happened to be conference weekend. Cooper made focusing on conference a little more challenging than it usually is :) but I did manage to hear a little nugget in the Saturday afternoon session that said something like... we focus so much sometimes on where we're going to raise our families but it doesn't matter what neighborhood we raise our kids in, it matters how we raise them within the walls of our own home. That comforted my worried heart about this tough decision, and I am confident those words were spoken directly for me.

Anyway, sorry this post is so emotional, I am kind of a hot mess right now. I don't know too terribly much about Aberdeen yet but here are a few nice things (more to calm myself down a little than anything else but oh well, humor me...)

• Joshua served his mission in Aberdeen
• Aberdeen is Kurt Cobain's home town. Woot woot.
• Ever since I watched 10 Things I Hate About You I have been determined to live in Tacoma- this will be pretty close. Technically I wanted to live in a lighthouse in Tacoma, but I've since come to realize that it would be really hard to arrange furniture in a circular house. 
• With the increased pay, the lower cost of living, and NO state income tax, we should actually be able to pay off our student loans. Something I never thought I'd say. Love you student loans.
• As someone who avidly hates sunshine, Cooper will probably seriously enjoy the pacific northwest.
• We may end up living in a town called Ocean Shores which is smack on the coast and Cooper and I could go for walks on the beach and pick up seashells and look for crabs.
• I fully intend to hike Mt. Rainier (Josh just laughs at me but just you wait, I will do it!)
• I think coastal Washington is beautiful. I love mountains and pine trees and especially fog. I hope there is a lot of fog. It makes me feel like there is a man with a chainsaw ready to jump out and murder me. Why is that exciting? I don't know, I guess it just makes me feel... mysterious?
• I see some fun weekend trips ahead of us, Seattle, Portland, Vancouver... We're also by Forks I suppose but I really hated Twilight so that's not super thrilling for me. We could go to Forks and laugh at all the Twilight tourists... That might be fun.
• This one is solely Josh's addition- "It doesn't snow so they don't salt the roads so people drive their classic cars around! Which is fun for me..." Happy for you babe...

That's about all I can dream up right now. Mostly I'm just nervous and stressed out and worried and anxious and want to cry and eat a pound of chocolate... So if anyone has any special sky mile acquisition tips like special credit cards or however else one acquires these mysterious flight miles (I have no idea) feel free to let me know. I have a feeling I'm going to be visiting a lot. 

Cooper Goes To The Petting Zoo

Today my mom and I took Cooper to This is the Place to see the baby animals. Cooper didn't really care about the baby animals so much but it was good practice at being outside. No child of mine shall hate the outdoors! He did however squish the wing of a baby chick in the nano second that I slackened my grip on him. Sorry baby chick! We've got a little Lennie on our hands.